Motivate Kate

THE STORY

For lots of years, I have struggled with my weight. Probably since the age of 10, I have been cognizant of my size. I come from a health-conscious and active family, but have always been the "creative" one and not the athlete. That's not to say I've never been athletic. . .all though my early years I was a swimmer, and sporadically throughout my adulthood, I've been a runner. Right now, I am a couch potato and computer addict.

I have always weighed more than my friends -- even at my smallest/fittest -- I was heavier than I looked. It seems that, for some reason, 154 pounds on me, looks more like 135 pounds on you. . .go figure. I think this is one reason why my weight has gotten so out of hand . . . Because, you see, for the longest time, I'd tell people what I weighed, and -- whether they were being polite or honest, they would say -- "well, you surely don't look like you weigh xxx." And, maybe I didn't -- but, it left me feeling like I didn't really look as heavy as I was -- and, as long as I didn't look fat, then I wasn't fat -- right? WRONG.

So, the wake up call? I am a professional photographer, which means, I'm usually TAKING the photos and, lucky for me, I'm rarely in the photos . . . until a couple of weeks ago at my niece's first birthday party. Someone took a family photo, and 'CLICK' there it was -- me -- at my heaviest. Ick. I knew I had gotten fat, but it wasn't until that photo that I realized just HOW fat I'd gotten. My thighs are really what did me in. I have always loved my legs, and generally, they've always been shapely -- but not HUGE.  Yeah, well, now, they're HUGE. And, not in that, it's all muscle b/c I'm a runner sort of way. They're huge in that I-have-elephant-thighs sort of way. NOT COOL.  Don't believe me? See for yourself (I'm on the far left, green shirt [duh]):

Honestly, this photo just makes me sad. I realized in seeing it that I have totally lost control of myself. I have lost perspective, and failed to put myself and my well-being first. Even now, I'm making excuses in my head for why I can't lose weight. I'm so busy; I have to clean the house; I have to edit client photos; I have to feed my husband . . . And, you know what? I do have to do all of those things, and I will.  But, I also have to do this: I have to tell you (the great big bad internet) that I've finally made a commitment to me. To my life. To my well-being. And, ultimately, to my happiness. 

THE GOAL

For now, I guess a goal is a good place to start.

I don't feel the need to publicly state my start weight. I realize that most people will say that's the best way to motivate and track progress, but frankly, I don't want to tell you. So, let's just say that first, short-term goal is to lose 30 pounds by my 32nd birthday (in February). That's not my ultimate goal, but I feel like it's a solid starting place and a reasonable timeframe.

THE PLAN

At least one workout daily -- 6 days a week, 30+ minutes a day.

Max 2 cups of coffee, one diet soda per day and PLENTY of water (I never drink enough water).

Focus on getting more veggies into meals and portion control.

Less convenience eating (bring my lunch, don't eat fast food).

Blog it -- as often as possible, but never instead of a workout!

TRACKING THE PROGRESS

Let's use the family photo (posted above) as my BEFORE photo.  As I mentioned, I'm a professional photographer and I love photography.  I assure you, there will be more photos to come -- plus, it seems that I need the visual reminder/wake-up call.

THE PLEA

I can't do this by myself. I have tried. I have failed. This is why I am taking to the blogosphere.  I need YOU.

I need y'all to be my cheering squad.  Ready to provide a little encouragement, but capable of calling me out and getting me back on track.  Please don't tell me that I shouldn't do this or that I don't need to do this. I know you're being kind, but that kind of talk is bad for me -- because I believe you (or want to at least). Be a friend. Leave your story. Commiserate. Gripe. Encourage. Be truthful, but kind.

Honestly, I'm not sure yet how this blog will take shape (no pun intended) but what I do know is that I desperately need it, and I need you.

Because there is no day like today. Right, friends?  Let's Motivate Kate. :-)